I still believe in the goodness of man. I believe that everyone has a good side of themselves. Even though how irresponsible the person is, or how unkind he is, I believe we shouldn't write them off because of that. It's naive, I must say, and I am not new to the pain and the hurt it caused. But I still feel it's a lot happier for me to have fond memories of them, or the very least neutral, than to have grudges against them.
Perhaps I'm the kind who dun bear grudges against people. It's too "energy consuming" for me. Our mood changes everytime we see the person whom we have grudges against. Why make ourselve unhappy? Forgive them... And forgive urself..
We are what we are, because of things that happen to us in the past, things that we encounter, and how we interpret and react to it. How can we be so sure that given the same situation, we won't behave like him? Things are neutral. It's how u see and how u interpret that makes the difference.
Therefore, I rather not remember the person's weaknesses but remember his strength. Learn from his strength. Everyone has some things to teach others. Even from my 3 yrs old nephew. His innocence and his inquisitive nature is what most of us have lost. Why pick on the person's flaws, and make urself feel bad or dislike him? Why not write off his flaws, remember his strength, learn from his strength and make urself happier?
Given a scenario: A person who is always the first to reach the office for 98% of the time, for once or twice, came into the office after lunch time. People will remember him for the late comer rather than the person who is early 98% of the time. But on the other hand, another person who are late for work for 98% of the time but reach the office early for a day or two, people will still remember him as the person who is always late.
So do we subconsciously tend to remember the flaws of other person??
There was a lone wanderer who had been traveling for many days and had grown weary. One day he stumbled upon an abandoned cabin in the woods.
Night began to fall as he peered through the cabin window. Deciding no one was occupying the space, the lone wanderer stepped inside and began to undress.Finding a small cot in a corner of the room, he tiredly rested his head upon a pillow. The last faint streams of sunlight illuminated a wooden chair a few feet from the cot. Upon the chair the man viewed an object. It sat coiled on the chair perfectly still.
A rattlesnake, the wanderer deduced and began to shiver. His fear of snakes, born in childhood, rose up inside him. The wanderer remained very still as the sun dipped completely below the horizon. His eyes stayed fixed upon the chair throughout the night.
At one point, he swore to himself that the snake began to slither and hiss. The petrified wanderer stiffened his body and shut his eyes tight. His heart pumped faster and faster, and he began to sweat profusely. His panic raced through the night along with the rapid beat of his heart.
The following morning, the owner of the cabin returned from his trip. He discovered the wanderer lying on his cot. He prodded the man several times, only to realize the man was dead. Confused, the owner looked around the room for clues to the stranger's identity.
He noticed the small pile of clothes tucked neatly beneath the wooden chair. Finding no clue to the man's identity inside the clothes, the owner gently placed them on the wooden chair. He removed the coil of rope on the wooden chair that he had left behind. What strange circumstances, the owner thought to himself.
What this short tale illustrates is the incredibly immense power inside each one of us. The wanderer's sure belief that the coil of rope on the chair was a snake created within him a panic that eventually killed him.
This example may seem strange to you, but we have inside of us this very same immense power. This is the power of our beliefs, our thoughts, of that which we accept and hold within us.
