To spoon feed may not be the best thing to do. I did it again... to spoon feed. I should stop it. Cos I wan her to know things doesn't come just like tat. At least some effort must be done, be it a simple thing like to ask, to get the thing. Even if u wan to win toto, u must at least go and buy the toto ticket. Often, things that come too easily will not be appreciated. Furthermore, going around to beg for the thing is not a easy thing, especially from someone u just know or dun even know.
It's comforting to know that she's studying harder this sem- she goes night study with friends. However, I presumed she goes night study because of her frens. If her frens dun wan to study, she wun stay in school to study. It's not that her frens are bad, but her priorities are wrong, even till now. She has already "died" twice, once in 'O' level, another during her mid yr exam this year. How many times does she wan to experience the same thing again? Or maybe the consequences are not painful enough? Her killer is not being lazy or so, but her frens, which is her limiting factor. She can plan very well, but once her frens comes into the picture, everything can be changed for them. So if that's the case, why study. She studies for her frens, not for herself. It's just a case of the blind leading the blind. Her frens never take 'A' level before, or go university before, so what advice can they give? Can they teach her and let her know the standard of the students that they are pitting against during 'A's?
It's good to go out with her frens occasionally, but going out will form the bonds between them that will make it more difficult to break in future. She's the kind who put frens first, and so history may repeat itself for her 'A's. There's really no turning back now. One small mistake may cause her 6 years, if, to get a diploma... Of cause, tat's the worst case.
A typical JC student mindset is studies first, becos they know there's no turning back. The stakes are high. And for her, hers is much much higher, and uphill task. Even I have no confidence to take her route. I feel that her poor 'O' level results is due to her priorities. She is smart, but wrong mentality. If that time I continue to coach her, she should be able to get into JC. I tried to change her fate once last year, because I "see" the final results, but in the end I can't fight fate, or should I say she can't fight fate, because I see some results during her mid year exams. On my part, I've changed her fate once, but she chose to give up. She got the results that I predicted. And that is why after her 'O' level, I wrote a letter to her to "console" her, even before her results are out. But now seems that she still can't learn from the previous mistake. There are some things that I can't tell- I can't tell her of her 'O' level results even before she take her 'O' level. But I do things with some reasons behind, only that I can't tell and will need her trust, if she wants to change her fate.
Sometimes people only learn when there's pain. If the pain is not painful enough, they will not learn. I should stop spoon feeding and let her learn and bear the consequences for things she chose and done, perhaps, sadly to say, the hard way. By carrying on spoon feeding, she may take me as a nag, which I already feel so, and i'm tired of that, and it may affect the friendship. Perhaps that's the best way for her to grow up, to let her feel pain, even to the extent of excruciating pain, if it can wake her. By providing for her, I'm only stunting her growth. Ok, I will not pass her the notes until she ask for it. If she dun even wan to ask, then I'll throw it away or get it returned. I want to see her effort to at least ask. Ask and it is given.
Sometimes, something, it's better to act blur. At times I just wonder why do people lie, especially without a motive, or maybe I dunno the motive. Someone lied today, and I felt... perhaps insulted. Initially I believe her until later when she split the beans without herself knowing while over the phone, or maybe it's on purpose. This is not the first time. But well, I just take it as it is. Just play along.
Perhaps I need an answer to some things. But that answer may not be what is socially accepted.
Since young I'm always the unorthodox person. Things that happen to me is always some very unique events. Maybe I'm the kind of "abnormal" person who attracts all the "abnormal" things to me. Heck it! I'm tired. I only want to be "normal".
I dun do what most people do. I believe in things that not many people understand. I know, I'm not just anyone. But who am I?
Everyone has a closed mind. It's just a matter of how they "boxed up" their mind. Some people's mind is closed around themselves, some closed around their family, some closed around their belief, some around their country, some around the world, some around the universe. A person who constantly argues and insist to be right, had closed his mind. A person who refute others' belief had closed his mind. A person who says he is right had closed his mind.
A person who thinks he is right had closed his mind around himself. A person who believes that blood is thicker than water had closed his mind around his family. A person who refute other religion had closed his mind around his belief. A person who believes "those who dies for his country" is a hero had closed his mind. A person who believes all aliens are evil had closed his mind. A person who has the concept of right and wrong had closed his mind. And the person who wrote this and say that everyone has a closed mind had closed his mind.
We tend to get too "involved" in ourselves. We forgot to look beyond ourselves, and perhaps even this life. There's a continuation of us, far beyond what we can see. Just because we cannot see it doesn't mean it does not exist. And just because we cannot see it makes us so much indulge in ourselves, in this life tat whatever pain or death that comes along, we take it as bad. Look far and beyond.
The Conservation of Energy- Energy cannot be created or destroyed. We, ourselves are energy. At atomic level, every atoms in our body possess energy. In solid, atoms vibrate abt fixed position. Liquid, molecules slide pass one another. Gas, particles move at high energy randomly. In our body, majority is liquid, so the molecules, which slides past one another, possess energy. So we are a collective of energy. On the macroscopic view, every object possess energy. Moving object has kinetic energy, an object high up has potential energy, battery has stored energy. So everything is energy too. When we move, we have kinetic energy. Even when we are not doing anything, our body stores food in the form of glycogen in the muscles for future use. So it's a form of stored energy.
The electromagnetic spectrum- from Gamma ray to Radio wave. Our eyes can only see and conceptualise waves of wavelength 400nm to 700 nm, which is only a tiny fraction of the whole spectrum. But can we deny the fact that the rest does not exist just because we cannot see it? The same way, a table or a chair that we are sitting on. We can feel that, touch that, because the frequency of vibration can be conceptualised by our senses. It is perhaps comparable to the "400nm to 700nm" region that our eye can see.
What on earth is not made of atoms? If atom is energy, everything is energy. A thought sent out, is energy itself. Energy possess frequency. Things resonate when the frequency matches the natural frequency and the amplitude increase many fold. So a thought, which is a frequency itself, will resonate and comes back to you.
Things Happen for a ReasonWas feeling quite bored yesterday after tuition and asked Wei Chuan, Kang Yih etc out. And during the conversation, I was surprised that Wei Chuan also believe in the Law of Attraction. I believe in tat too, but have not been practising for quite some time. Somehow I got "linked" back to it. Will start practising again. Well, things happen for a reason. Someone out there wants to tell me to carry on. Ok, I will!!
I think what Johnny says is right. I should focus on one and have a clear goal instead of being a jack of all trades. I'm losing focus..
Feeling so stagnant.. Dun feel like doing anything, but feeling very bored not doing anything....
Dun really have much things to blog these days.. Waiting for thing to lay out nicely for me.. I shouldn't say nothing happen these days. Maybe too many things.. But it's not up to my control. So dun control. Is it really not up to my control? Or is it that I dun want to control?
